When parents disagree over custody, it is easy to focus on what the other parent is doing wrong. A parent may start keeping a list of missed pickups, angry texts or disagreements over schedules, hoping those details will strengthen a custody case. But the same conduct can receive scrutiny from the court, particularly when it affects the child or the other parent’s relationship with the child.
Connecticut courts consider several factors when determining custody and visitation, with the child’s best interests at the center. A parent’s conduct during the dispute can become part of that picture.
These four common mistakes can make a complicated custody case harder to manage:
1. Ignoring a court-ordered parenting plan
A parent who disagrees with a custody arrangement cannot simply decide to stop following it. The court may look at how each parent supports the child’s relationships and complies with existing custody orders
If an existing schedule no longer works, a parent can ask the court to modify the arrangement rather than disregarding it.
2. Putting the child in the middle
A custody dispute involves the parents, but children can quickly become caught between them. Asking a child to carry messages, choose sides or report on the other parent can add another layer of conflict.
Connecticut courts may consider whether a parent has attempted to involve the child in the parents’ dispute or manipulate the child. The court can also look at whether each parent can maintain a meaningful role in the child’s life.
3. Blocking appropriate contact with the other parent
A parent may have legitimate concerns about the other parent. However, unilaterally restricting contact can create additional custody issues when the restriction does not follow a court order or address a genuine safety concern.
Judges may also look at whether a parent’s conduct helps maintain healthy family connections.
4. Moving without considering the parenting plan
A move can change more than a child’s address. It may affect school, transportation, parenting time and the child’s relationship with the other parent.
In certain post-judgment relocation cases, Connecticut law requires the relocating parent to establish a legitimate purpose for the move, that the move is reasonable and that the move serves the child’s best interests.
Keep the focus on the child
During a custody dispute, it can be tempting to treat every disagreement as evidence against the other parent. A more careful approach is to consider how each decision affects the child and an existing custody arrangement.
Parents who face a custody dispute should seek legal guidance before making major changes to parenting time, relocation plans or other arrangements that could affect the case.
